Time seems to have just flown by. It's both a blessing and a curse. I'm desperately trying to get back to the things that make me happy, truly happy, and that's proving to be more difficult than I originally thought. I want to get back to my art. There are times when I really miss my life of quiet contemplation and deep introspective reflection. I don't feel like myself at the moment. My entire life is currently consumed by lists, schedules, agendas, plans, commitments, responsibilities, etc. Modern life in the civilized world can be so mundane.
But on that note, it's a catch-22. While I hate the fast-paced, high-stress commonality of society, I absolutely adore the music, the impossibly cute techy-gadgets, and the conquering of the unknown. The dichotomy often leaves me feeling confused and more than a bit lost. As humans we are never satisfied. We keep reaching for what should technically be out of reach. While this can be quite upsetting, there is little I can do to fight it.
For once in the duration of my college career I feel like I'm finally taking a class that I can actually learn something from. Something that has meaning. Something of value. My religions class constantly gives me something to chew on. There is so much insight and perspective to be absorbed and appreciated. For instance, the cloistered lives of devout worshippers such as monks and nuns. Lives in which material possessions hold no value, and in which their relationship with God takes TOP priority. Even though many of these people had lives before they made their vows, they ultimately find happiness in seclusion. It's hard for me to explain, but something about that moves me in indescribable ways. I have great admiration for people that find themselves and live peaceful and joyful lives. I can only hope that I may someday arrive at that place.